Sunday, May 4, 2008

The Face of Genius


Kel's cousin made the comment the other day that she thought Drew looked very wise. Now, I'm not sure I would use the word "wise" for someone who regularly poops themselves, but I know where she's coming from. Drew is typically very alert and always seems to be studying everything around him very carefully. I don't remember the other kids being like that quite so early. Although, with the circus that is our house there is plenty to keep him occupied.

It makes me think of my earliest childhood memories. Some, I'm convinced, were very early. Most of them are completely random. I saw a picture recently of me and some of my cousins at my grandparents' house and I looked very small. But I remember that day very well. My cousin Chuck had just gotten one of those nerf boomerangs (had to be the coolest thing I'd ever seen) and I was amazed. It was green with yellow grips. We took turns throwing it and chasing after it unnecessarily (since it kept coming back to where it started.) Nothing important, but I've never forgotten it.

I remember being outside one time when I was pretty small and seeing my dad across the yard waving for me to come over to where he was. For some reason, I ran the other way and went inside instead, and I remember being really upset that I didn't do what he said. I'm positive Dad has no recollection of such an insignificant event. Completely random, but burned in my brain forever.

It then dawned on me that Ally (and quite possibly Ben) are already older than I was in many of the memories that I remember pretty clearly. What are the things that will stick in their memories? Gulp. What are the things that are already cemented in there? Hopefully, they are good memories. But, it doesn't take me too long to think of things I hope aren't the ones that stick. Times I got too upset, or times I was too harsh with them. They've seen me at my best, and at my worst.

The good news is that they still seem to be pretty fond of Dad. I guess I haven't messed them up too badly. Come to think of it, I'm sure my parents made plenty of mistakes with me as they were figuring this parenting thing out - but I have no memories of those. Still, I'm going to try and be more aware of how permanent every situation could be in their minds. No pressure . . . :)

-Jeff