Does the fire marshall know about this cake?

A couple of weeks ago . . . it happened. I turned 30. I woke up, same as any other day, but I'm pretty sure out there in the distance somewhere . . . . I could just make out the sound of my sister laughing. (Completely ignoring the fact, mind you, that she's knocking on the door of that same milestone herself . . .) Oh yeah, she's been waiting for this day for a long time.

Actually, the day came and went with a whimper. The whimper was mine - as I was fighting some kind of cold that day and as usual I was a lousy patient. All in all, though, it really wasn't a big deal and I didn't expect it to be. But it wasn't all that long ago that the thought of turning 30 was the pure definition of 'becoming old.' Pretty funny, really.

I remember several things about turning 20. Within a little more than a week of turning 20 I also got married. I distinctly remember still feeling like a kid when faced with the suddenly all-too-real responsibilities of being a new husband and 'official grown up.' It took a little bit, but Kel was definitely ready to start having kids before I was. I clearly remember thinking to myself: "I'm still a kid, I can't be having a kid . . ." I was 24 when Ally was born. I remember the fear when we first came home with her from the hospital and it really sank in that we were on our own with our new baby - and there weren't nurses coming in to help every couple of hours. I definitely felt like a kid.

I had a lot of growing up to do. I still do. The twenties kind of felt like adulthood with training wheels. Yes, you have responsibilities and you learn a lot, but you are kind of expected to still mess some things up because you're young. I'm not so sure the same applies to the 30's. I have a fear that I should have learned more than I did . . . You know, like how it's cute when the 3 month old baby finds his hands and starts sucking his thumb. But when you're that kid sucking your thumb in the 3rd grade it's not so cute anymore. I think I might be that kid.

I guess we'll find out. For now, I'm just going to enjoy my twenty-something wife for another month or so. Then we'll both be 'old.' Just ask my sister.

-Jeff

So I've been thinking

about starting a blog . . . oh, wait. I already did. I just don't post there anymore . . . Well, that's got to change. There have been a ton of things happening lately. I don't say that in order to say that I've been too busy, but more because there's a lot of stuff that I'd like to write about.

More to come, I hope.

-Jeff

The Face of Genius

Kel's cousin made the comment the other day that she thought Drew looked very wise. Now, I'm not sure I would use the word "wise" for someone who regularly poops themselves, but I know where she's coming from. Drew is typically very alert and always seems to be studying everything around him very carefully. I don't remember the other kids being like that quite so early. Although, with the circus that is our house there is plenty to keep him occupied.

It makes me think of my earliest childhood memories. Some, I'm convinced, were very early. Most of them are completely random. I saw a picture recently of me and some of my cousins at my grandparents' house and I looked very small. But I remember that day very well. My cousin Chuck had just gotten one of those nerf boomerangs (had to be the coolest thing I'd ever seen) and I was amazed. It was green with yellow grips. We took turns throwing it and chasing after it unnecessarily (since it kept coming back to where it started.) Nothing important, but I've never forgotten it.

I remember being outside one time when I was pretty small and seeing my dad across the yard waving for me to come over to where he was. For some reason, I ran the other way and went inside instead, and I remember being really upset that I didn't do what he said. I'm positive Dad has no recollection of such an insignificant event. Completely random, but burned in my brain forever.

It then dawned on me that Ally (and quite possibly Ben) are already older than I was in many of the memories that I remember pretty clearly. What are the things that will stick in their memories? Gulp. What are the things that are already cemented in there? Hopefully, they are good memories. But, it doesn't take me too long to think of things I hope aren't the ones that stick. Times I got too upset, or times I was too harsh with them. They've seen me at my best, and at my worst.

The good news is that they still seem to be pretty fond of Dad. I guess I haven't messed them up too badly. Come to think of it, I'm sure my parents made plenty of mistakes with me as they were figuring this parenting thing out - but I have no memories of those. Still, I'm going to try and be more aware of how permanent every situation could be in their minds. No pressure . . . :)

-Jeff

Becoming

What a great weekend! I got the opportunity to go back home to our previous church and lead worship for students during their D-Now weekend. The rust was apparent, but I had a great time and hopefully somehow it was effective. I'm very thankful to our great friends Jeff and Wini for giving us opportunities to serve and work with students that we love very much.

We've been gone from there for over three years now so there were many new faces, but several familiar ones as well. It's always fun to see which students have stepped up to become the leaders of the group, and to see where God is leading them. The theme of the weekend was "Becoming," as in becoming the person that God is shaping you to be. The Bible study leaders talked about, and gave examples from their own lives, how events, relationships, passions, and struggles have ultimately helped make them who they are. The students were challenged to recognize how God is preparing them for what He has in store for them, and challenged to go and do hard things -- to not simply coast along even though teenagers are typically given plenty of opportunity to do so.

We saw several students respond. Some were ready to take hard things that had happened to them and let them strengthen them. Others were resolved to start fresh. I also heard more than one leader make the comment that the 'becoming' process wasn't finished for them either. I think they are right. It seems that we are continually squeezed and shaped by things both good and bad. We are constantly being prepared, and I'm thankful for that.

-Jeff

That's it, I'm going back...

So we've been going through Galatians in our class on Sunday mornings, and Smith is apparently convinced that they were in a city called Galos. Regardless of where they were, Paul was clearly frustrated with their behavior. When he was with them previously, it made sense. They understood the gospel and had been set free by its truth. However, once he left they began reverting back and trying to rely on the Law they had been set free from.

Over and over he tries to explain how foolish they have been. Then there's this comment where Paul calls them his "little children, for whom I am again in the anguish of childbirth until Christ is formed in you!" (Gal 4:19) Now, after just witnessing Drew's entrance into the world, I can clearly see the frustration that Paul was trying to express. I'd hate to be the messenger that had to tell Kel: "You did a great job on that delivery. Let's try again, and maybe he'll stay out this time . . ."

It's a pretty foolish picture, but I can understand the desire. It's what they knew - it was comfortable. I'm pretty convinced that Drew, given how crazy and loud his brother and sister (and me) can make it around here, might think that the comfort and security of the womb doesn't sound too bad right now. But the truth is, he's so much better off where he is. It may not be as comfortable as before, but he's growing. Things may not always make sense, but we're here to take care of him and guide him, and hopefully one day they will.

Sometimes it's easy to fall back into things have already been overcome. For the Galatians, it was a dependence on a Law that only exposed their sin - instead of the gospel that defeats it. For me, sometimes it's sin, often it's insecurity.

What is it for you?

-Jeff

Amazed

Friday was the last day at work of a guy that I've worked with for a few years. He is a pretty interesting guy. He loves music, plays a little guitar, and is also deaf. I believe with a little help (and volume) there are a few frequencies he can pick up which allows him to hear somewhat. He is also an excellent lip reader and it usually seemed perfectly natural to have a normal conversation with him - even though all the while he probably actually heard very little if any of my voice.

As he was saying his goodbyes the subject of his deafness came up and he made a comment that was essentially this: Don't pity people who have a disability who don't fight and find a way to overcome it and live out a "normal" life. I was kind of torn. Obviously, he is a good example of someone who enjoys a lot of life that you wouldn't expect someone with his disability could. However, I thought that was an extremely broad statement and surely there are a ton of disabilities that would truly prohibit someone from agreeing with that.

I went back to my desk thinking about that and happened to see a link to this video. It's of a high school wrestler from Ohio named Dustin Carter - and it is truly amazing. Dustin has no arms or legs. Did I mention he is a wrestler? Did I also mention that I read he was 41-3 in his matches this past season? You can see him in action here.

Wow. My excuses seem pretty lame at this point.

-Jeff

Dreaming of a white Easter?

What a day... A few hours before I took this photo, the kids and I were playing in the back yard, enjoying the sunshine and the warm weather. I remember sitting on the swing with Ben, neither of us even needing a jacket, thinking "I'm glad the cold weather is finally gone . . ." That's what I get for thinking. I never saw it coming.

Great worship service this morning. The place was loud, the church responded, and the joy was contagious. And it should be. We remember "Friday" - all was lost. But it's Sunday now. The tomb is empty. Death couldn't hold on. The price was paid. There is hope.

For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his. We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin. Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. We know that Christ, being raised from the dead, will never die again; death no longer has dominion over him. For the death he died he died to sin, once for all, but the life he lives he lives to God. So you also must consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus. Romans 6:5-11

How amazing is that? However dark Friday was, it's Sunday now.

Happy Resurrection Day!

-Jeff